As mompreneurs, many of us make goals that we honest-to-goodness believe we will accomplish.
Maybe this year your goal is to actually turn a profit in your biz. Or it might to grow and finally hire a VA. Or to find the time to dive back into a hobby that's gone by the wayside since kids and a business came in the picture. Have more date nights…
Whatever your aspiration, it's something you likely imagine will improve your quality of life in a way that you've been missing in days past.
And if you're like me, you honestly make these goals with the absolute best of intentions and seriousness. You really, truly want to improve your biz and life. However, somewhere around the sixth week of trying, you're off your blogging schedule and you’ve missed three of your favorite yoga classes and figure what the hell, it's not doing anything for me anyway. So you give up. Settle for less exposure, get back in your “curvy” jeans and grab a pint of Ben and Jerry’s.
Now, those people out there that have everything together, yeah you know the ones, I hate them too, they might claim that people like you and I aren't disciplined enough, intentional enough. Or that we simply chose the wrong business model, exercise program, hobby, or goal and just weren't into it enough to stick with it.
But the lowdown is, either those people are mutants, they're so far removed from our reality that they have no idea what it's like to be a mompreneur with littles, or they’ve figured out how to harness their personality superpowers.
Because here's the truth, mompreneurs have every intention of creating the best lives possible for themselves and their families. They truly desire to make working from home work. They want to grow a biz, cook healthy family dinners, make their kids’ bake sale goodies from scratch, and have beautiful clean homes. But mompreneurs lack one resource the rest of the world seems to have in abundance: Free Time.
Our ultimate wish is for more time.
More time for self, more time for family, more time for fun, and more time to work
If we found a genie’s lamp we wouldn’t need three wishes. Really, we’d only need one and we’d wish for a professional to handle to all of the dirty or unfun or boring aspects of our businesses that infringe upon our time and prevent us from enjoying life the way we choose.
Because of this insane, utter restriction on our time, it is a challenge to stick to our goals regardless of how much we feel we want the results.
As moms of littles, anything we choose to do for ourselves typically means altering our schedules (read: getting even less sleep).
Maybe we have to wake up early or stay up late. Maybe we try to fit our work into nap time, only to be cut short halfway through our workout because baby woke up early.
The kinda annoying thing is though, every person on this planet has the same 24 hours in each day. As much as we want to prioritize ourselves and as much as we try, there are only so many minuscule slivers of time where we mamas have the opportunity.
So today, instead of trying to invent a time machine, I’m gonna help you capitalize on your own superpowers. I'm going to teach you three tips that can help you understand your personality in a new way and ultimately help you stick to and accomplish your goals.
Determine your motivation style: Intrinsic vs Extrinsic
Did you know there are two different types of motivation?
It’s true. People find fuel and drive in one of two ways. And their type of motivation is relatively fixed and established early in life.
Similar to introverts and extroverts, people are also internally (intrinsically) or externally (extrinsically) motivated. The two don’t necessarily go hand in hand, meaning an introvert can certainly be extrinsically motivated and vice versa. However, the locus (source) of motivation is similar, either within the self, or without.
Now, in case the previous paragraph really screwed with your brain, here’s a super easy way to understand the types of motivation and to figure out which one fits you best.
Think back to when you were in middle school and you had one of your first big tests coming up that you really wanted to get a good grade on. What was your reason for wanting an A?
- Did you want to be able to show your grade off to all of your friends?
- Did you want to make your parents proud?
- Did you want to show your teacher how good of a job she did helping you after class?
Sounds like you are extrinsically motivated.
On the other hand,
- Did you want to get an A so that you could prove how smart you were to yourself?
- Were you competing against the last test where you got an 89% and were pissed at yourself?
Then you’re intrinsically motivated.
I get it, not all of us were wonderful students, but take the example and apply it to another situation in your young life. The point is, we all fall into one of two categories and have since we were little kids. Sure there may be a little overlap, but you’ll likely see where one type of motivation is dominant in your life.
But what does this have to do with reaching your goals?
Because if you understand what keeps you on track, you can set up strategies to capitalize on your specific personality traits.
For more insight into your personality, grab this FREE motivation style checklist!
Once you know which side of the coin you fall on, go ahead an evaluate where your goal is coming from. Search your soul and really determine your reason for wanting to accomplish whatever it is you’ve set out to do. Is this goal to show off for others? Is it to make your husband happy or to live up to the media’s standards?
If any of these are true, I urge you to reconsider your goal. It doesn’t matter whether you are externally motivated, but your desire for life improvement needs to come from within you. Authentic goals are much more likely to steer you in the right direction and the rewards are much more personal.
If you go ahead and determine the accomplishment is something you really want for yourself, then here's how to tackle it.
Create something that signifies how meaningful this goal is for you.
- Maybe you write it in a journal, or find another personal to communicate to yourself how important the goal is. Really dig deep. Answer what it would mean to you if your dream was a reality a year from now. What if it wasn’t? What would this feel like? How would you feel about yourself?
- Make the goal enjoyable. Challenge yourself to do tasks in a fun way that energize your spirit
- Give yourself ample personal space to explore your goal from all angles
- Align the goal with your bigger purpose. Explore how accomplishing it fits into your larger calling and how doing so will propel you toward your passion.
- Find your flow. Whatever it is that takes you to your flow state, meditation, Native flute background music, a strong drink…get into your flow as often as possible. The more you get there the more you’ll create and the closer you’ll get to your goals.
Since extrinsic motivation seems to be for those who are Type-A, and competitors. Go ahead and make a sport out of your goal.
- Hang up a picture of what accomplishing your goal will look like.
- Tell everyone you know that in a year from now you will XXXX, not only does this externalize your goal, it keeps you accountable when friends and family check in on your status.
- Set up a reward system, use a grown-up chore chart, that gets larger the closer you get to your goal
- If the goal is business related, give yourself a bonus
- Schedule a spa day, hike, concert…for the day after you meet your deadline
Now, I know none of these tips address the huge lack of time that all new moms face. However, knowing what motivates you can certainly help you use the small slice of time you do have to your advantage. Knowing the quickest ways to get yourself into goal ass-kicking mode is only going to help you be more efficient and more effective.